This is the shop of the Blue Screen of Death. We are a band.
If you have found this page I will assume that you have heard what we do and you've probably already made your judgements, so I'm not going to play the usual self-promoting, sycophantic games.
In this shop you can spend your money on materialistic items which will leave you ultimately unfulfilled and depressed. You consumersist swine.
However, your disatisfaction will bring us much joy, as each pound/dollar/yen you spend here is a pound/dollar/yen that goes into our very empty pockets.
We have no money. In all likelihood, we never will have any money. We make music because we enjoy making music. We feel we deserve to be paid for it because we are self-indulgent, egotistical, self-absorbed victims of the media propaganda which promotes unquestioning, unfounded self-assurance in a market set up to punish those that dare stray from the norm.
We run this shop ourselves. We welcome local people and non-local people alike. We will try to be as professional as possible, but please bear in mind that we are incompetent on many levels, and this can sometimes make things difficult. Although we are essentially socially retarded, we are friendly and harmless, so please get in touch if you have any questions/queries/comments etc.
We will aim to ship you your wonderful goods to you as soon as possible and will try to keep you updated with progress. If you haven't heard anything from us within a week, drop us an email, but please don't shout. Shouting makes us angry, and you wouldn't like us when we're angry... We use Her Majesty's Royal Mail to deliver your goods in a timely fashion, and trust that she will never let us down.
With your support, we hope to one day earn enough capitalist tokens to enable us to hire Mr Blobby as our full-time valet.